


Fangs and Angels

by deanbennylife (kams_log)



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Universe, Angel Dean, Angst, Earth, Fluff, Heaven, Human Dean (Temporary), Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Purgatory, Rating May Change, Vampire Benny, at the end
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-14
Updated: 2015-05-16
Packaged: 2018-03-30 14:37:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 8,364
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3940516
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kams_log/pseuds/deanbennylife
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dean was an angel of heaven, assigned to watch over mankind and slay monsters. It was a simple mission, one most other angels easily followed. Until Dean made the fatal mistake of falling in love, and falling from Heaven. But could he still protect the man, or vampire, he loved with broken wings?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> An idea I had brewing in my head the past two weeks. Finally managed to write it.
> 
> This is just short story. It'll have three chapters plus an epilogue, and I already have the next two chapters written. I'll post the next chapter tomorrow, then the third on Saturday. If all goes well, the epilogue will be on Sunday.
> 
> Also, I'd like to make it clear that this is nothing like the supernatural canon. Some of the events from the show I kept in this story for plot purposes, but otherwise, I've twisted canon to fit the needs of the story. So if something isn't accurate to canon, it's okay, I know. I did it on purpose.
> 
> I hope you guys like it!

It wasn’t that Dean hated being an angel. Far from it, really. He was perfectly fine with having wings, making his home in heaven, following orders and doing God’s will.

But being an angel began to lack its appeal when God left and everyone claimed to be in on the next big secret of their father’s mission.

Dean didn’t buy it for a second. But he had his post. He was a grunt, a soldier that could be cast aside as soon as it suited their leader’s wishes. Dean was fine with that. He didn’t believe in their current purpose anyway. ‘Just watch humanity. Make sure it doesn’t get into too much trouble.’

 _Trouble_ , as the other angels called it, was letting Eve’s children grow in too many numbers and destroy too many innocents. That was _trouble_ for now.

Dean could understand that. He could respect it too. That’s why he was all too happy to leave heaven on his orders, find a perfect vessel to match his grace, and walk the earth like a second home.

That’s what it felt like. Earth. There was something about its quality that struck Dean as familiar, like some kind of ancient code in his system that knew he was always meant to be stationed here. He sometimes wondered if it was God’s will. He wondered if he was always meant to find his way to the temporary home of the humans, the place where such chaos and evil could be born, but where such goodness and kindness could also take root and grow.

He spent most of his time there, on earth. He was present for most of the world’s greatest events, some of which that never entered the human history books for how dangerous they truly were. Dean watched Rome fall. He watched the Pilgrims set sail. He saw it all.

His brothers and sisters still stationed in heaven thought he was getting too close. He was getting too ‘comfortable’ with the humans and their morals. Dean rolled his eyes, even if it wasn’t helpful to his standing with them.

They feared humanity was corrupting him. Dean didn’t know how to explain that they did no such thing. He’d always been wired that way. He was certain God had programmed him to have all of the same feelings as humans, to desire what they desired, to want more from such a basic, boring existence of watching and waiting for evil to strike.

Some of the angels, those who believed in Dean and his mission for the humans, called him the ‘Righteous Man.’ He was the one in every council meeting of heaven, standing up for humanity and pointing his finger at the elders who claimed that earth was just a mud pit for hopeless monkeys. He was the one who made sure every earth stationed angel stayed true to their goal—protect the humans, slay the monsters.

The other angels, the ones who hated him and believed he’d been corrupted, made sure to constantly remind him of his true purpose. He was meant to be ‘the sword of Michael.’ He was a blunt instrument, an object to be used. He was meant to pave the way for Michael’s glory in the coming apocalypse, the same apocalypse that Dean was desperately trying to stop from happening.

Dean knew he wasn’t worth much in the long scheme of eternity. He knew he could be cast aside at any time, thrown away like the garbage they all saw him as. Dean was fine with that.

All he cared about was making sure humanity would be safe. He didn’t care what happened to him if he could guarantee just that much.

It was around that time that Dean met Benny Lafitte.

He was a man from down in Louisiana. It was a state hopping with vampire infestation. It ripped apart the underground, killed hundreds and turned hundreds more. Dean had moved two angels to the state to try and dwindle the monsters numbers without causing too much panic among the remaining humans. It was a slow, tedious effort. But it worked, and they continued.

Benny Lafitte was trapped in the middle of a massive nest. They were pirates, had killed many people, and Dean knew they were likely to kill many more. They were next on his list to wipe out.

But Benny Lafitte changed that.

He was an honest man. A dry, sarcastic man that made Dean clench his jaw many times in frustration or embarrassment. But he was a good person. He reminded Dean of the original mission, of how important humanity was. He held the ideals of what humanity should always be about.

Dean couldn’t help but get a little closer. He never spoke to the man, never drew near enough to actually hold a face to face conversation. Dean was too careful for that. But still he watched, observed. He wanted to know more about the man that rang so true in the fabric of history and mankind. He wanted to be closer to the being that reminded him of his father’s original, true plan for humanity.

The first time they spoke was a complete accident.

Dean had been watching him, as he usually did. The soldiers under his command, René and Titus, were off scouting the pirate nest and where it would be best to strike. Dean stood near the pier, watching as the sailors and fishermen readied their ships for the new day approaching.

The sun was beginning to grace over the ocean waves when a man tapped Dean on the shoulder. Not used to being touched, Dean spun around, ready for an attack or vampire who’d recognized him, but all he saw were blue eyes and an amused smile.

“You lookin’ for someone, brother?” Benny Lafitte asked.

Dean could only stare. Because yes. The answer was yes, and the man himself stood right before his eyes.

“Just watching,” Dean replied carefully, offering his own friendly (human) smile.

Benny laughed and nodded. “Not much ta’ see here,” he said, gestured to the ships and the waves. “At leas’ not right now. Come on back at the end of the day… now _there’s_ somethin’ ta’ see.”

Dean couldn’t help but grin.

“I’ll be here, then.”

Benny grinned and walked down the pier. Dean watched him deliver something to one of the ship captains. When Benny turned around again, Dean was gone from sight.

Dean couldn’t risk meeting with the man he cared for again. Dean knew he was already within a thread of being punished by the elders of heaven. He couldn’t afford to lose his standing, or his station, now. Not even for Benny Lafitte, the one man Dean found himself wanting to be closer to every day.

That was when the vampire’s took him.

It was the first time Dean felt rage tickle through his blood.

He grabbed René and Titus without a moment’s hesitation, and together they tore apart every nest they could find. His brother and sister thought they were cleaning up a new infestation. Dean was looking for Benny.

They found him back where Dean had first spoken with him. On the pier, with the vampire pirates. Benny had already been turned.

Titus drew his sword, ready to destroy each of them, but Dean was ashamed when he stopped him.

“They are monsters, Dean,” Titus glared when Dean refused to move. “What of the other nests we have cleared? What of them? Are these abominations the exception?”

Dean didn’t answer. He didn’t let a single vampire from that nest die that night.

They lost them to the sea the next morning.

René was the one who reported him to the elders. They slapped his wrists in rebuke, sent him to ‘corrections’ for a short time until they believed he was fit for duty. But Dean only went back to his station with unbridled rage, blood burning for vengeance against the monsters who had turned a beautiful, honest man into one of their abominations.

Dean swept across the globe in search of the nest. He didn’t even stop to consider if Benny was even still alive. He knew that nest was ruthless, didn’t hesitate to kill their own if they so felt like it. He also knew of the presence of hunters.

By the time he had Benny in his sights again, years had passed, and Benny stood with a woman on his arm and a smile on his lips in Greece.

Dean stared. He couldn’t do anything. Benny was still turned, still a vampire. There was no cure, yet he was living almost exactly as he had before the monsters took him. He was decent, he was honest, and he was _good_. Benny was still a beautiful, wonderful man. He still embodied everything Dean believed God had intended for humanity. The only difference was the presence of his fangs, and his need for blood to get by.

But he wasn’t killing anyone. He was careful. He was just.

Dean nearly wept in joy that day. The only man in the entire world, in all of history that consumed Dean’s thoughts, was safe and still as good as the day Dean first saw him. He’d never felt such happiness before in all his life.

He should have known it never would have lasted.

His old nest tracked Benny down, back to where it all began, in Louisiana. They were going to kill Benny, and his love Andrea.

Dean refused to let it happen. He was going to protect them, protect the essence of humanity that Dean loved. He wasn’t going to let it be destroyed or corrupted ever again.

His blade was ready. His blood still burned for vengeance. He saw the vampires coming towards Benny’s home.

He was one step from attacking when the angels stopped him.

They had to drag him kicking and screaming all the way back to heaven’s gates, and he didn’t stop fighting until they had him chained to the floor in front of the elders.

In two words, Dean felt his life end.

“You failed.”

They’d been talking about his station. About his mission. Dean could only see Benny’s head leave his shoulders as the angels had torn him away.

The elders discussed what happened, how he was located. They knew it was likely that Dean might try to find the man again, the man he’d ‘fallen for.’

“You were corrupted by humanity,” they said. “You fell for them in every possible way. Now, all that’s left is to finish the job.”

He fell from heaven that day. They tried to take his grace, bottle it away so Dean would never get it back. But he wasn’t an idiot. He’d been one of their angels since the dawn of creation. He would never go down easy.

He managed to steal it back before they cast him to the earth.

His wings burned anyway.

Dean wandered the earth for years. He didn’t age with his grace intact, but he couldn’t fly, and he was forever banished from the only place he’d had a family.

Earth was his home. But now, he was alone.

Dean wouldn’t let it get to him.

He adopted the human lifestyle with reckless abandon. There was nothing to hold him back from indulging in every sin in heaven’s book. He tried to tell himself he wasn’t doing it out of spite, but he couldn’t erase the pleasure he took in knowing that the angels would be disgusted with him now.

He drank, he smoked. He slept with anyone who accepted him into their bed, and he was always sure to leave by morning.

It was too much. Somehow, in the late nights as he was grinding bodies with another human, he could never get the image of blue eyes out of his mind. He couldn’t look down without imagining someone else below him, someone else gasping his name and holding him as much as Dean wanted to hold back.

He felt too sick in the mornings to stay.

He went on like that for nearly fifty years before he realized he didn’t have to live that way anymore. He didn’t have to do it. He couldn’t give up. It would give the angels too much pleasure to see him waste away into the dust of the world, the same earth that Dean used to love and cherish with every fiber of his being.

But now, the only way to connect with that love again, was to find the man who made it _real_.

Dean began his mission to find purgatory.

It was easier said than done, he realized. Only monsters could enter purgatory, and even angels avoided that place. The last time the angels broke into purgatory, countless soldiers had died. No one dared enter that hell again.

But Dean was determined. He found a way to enter purgatory. He found an old friend, a sister angel if she still believed in little things like ‘family.’ But when he found her, she took one look at him and smiled so brightly, Dean almost dared to believe in hope again.

“I need you to take me to purgatory,” Dean explained when they found a quiet place to talk.

Tessa stared at him in disbelief. “You do realize what you’re asking for?” She asked. “That’s not like asking to break into heaven or hell, or even another dimension. You know better than any of us what that place holds.”

Dean nodded. “That’s why I’m asking, Tess.”

Tessa frowned deeply. She’d always told him how much she hated his nickname for her. But back then, she’d always rolled her eyes and smiled. Things were different now. It wasn’t like he was family now. He was disowned by heaven. He couldn’t get much lower. He’d understand if she turned him down.

She sighed. “What else do you need?”

Dean smiled weakly. “A way out.”

“It’s going to cost you. You know that.”

“I do.”

Dean pulled out a vial and stared at it. He couldn’t believe he was willing to give up this much for one man, one vampire. But Dean was lost. He didn’t know what else to do anymore.

Tessa withdrew her blade and pulled Dean close, her hand wrapped around the back of his neck and her fingers tugged at his hair until his throat was bared.

She made a small incision. It hurt, but not as much as the freezing cold of his grace seeping out from his body. It collected into the vial, and Tessa ran a hand over the cut, healing it instantly.

Dean felt hollow, but Tessa smiled at him gently.

“I’ll try not to use all of it,” she promised. “But you’ll have to be quick.”

Dean shivered, but nodded. “I will.”

That night, Dean stared up at the trees of purgatory. He started running.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you guys enjoyed it! See you guys tomorrow with chapter two.


	2. Chapter 2

It took longer than he hoped. It was days, he was sure, before he started to recognize patterns in the chaos. Certain monsters that refused to die, who left the biggest trails of guts and blood behind them. Dean didn’t know which one would lead to Benny, but he kept running, slaying and cutting away any monster that dared get too close.

There were many.

“Yer’ the human,” one monster had hissed when Dean cut off its legs. “Bright as a beacon, you are.”

“I’m looking for a vampire,” Dean growled.

The monster spit up blood. “Lots of those ‘round here.”

“Only looking for one,” Dean replied. “Benny Lafitte. Cajun accent. Bright blue eyes.”

The monster glared at him, or at least tried too. Its eyes glassed over and its limbs shook. “Look north.”

“Thanks,” Dean feigned a smile. He cut off its head.

He had no reason to trust any monster in purgatory. But he didn’t have any other options. His grace was gone. He was human now. The only thing he could do was hope for the best, and stay damn _alive_.

His heart almost stopped beating when a monster got the drop on him for the first time. It tackled him, and they went rolling in the dirt. Dean dropped his blade, and no matter how hard he tried to reach for it, he couldn’t. His arms were too preoccupied keeping the monster above him from sinking its teeth into his face.

But still, he blindly reached, hoping against hope for some kind of miracle.

That was when the weight suddenly lifted from him, and Dean swung for his blade. He was on his feet a moment later, and his heart skipped a beat.

Benny Lafitte stood hunched over the dead monster, its head nearly ripped off from the sheer force of Benny’s hands. But it was Benny’s fanged snarl that turned to look at him that had Dean’s knees shaking.

It was him. It was _him_.

Benny just saved him.

“You saved me,” Dean said as much.

Benny laughed, a low, humorless sound that Dean didn’t like. It didn’t sound like the same Benny he used to know. “That I did.” He looked Dean over, his eyes narrowing in thought.

“You don’ look too worried ‘bout where you are for a human trapped in monster heaven.”

“Might be ‘cause I’m not trapped,” Dean replied. He took a chance and lowered his blade. He was only human. But if Benny turned out to be a full-fledged monster now, Dean decided he didn’t care if he died now. What was life anyway if humanity turned out to be corruptible no matter how good it was? It was a life not worth living. Not to Dean.

Benny raised an eyebrow. “Then what’re ya’ still doin’ here, brother?”

Dean bit the inside of his cheek, stared at Benny in thought.

He wasn’t sure what to say. It wasn’t ordinary to spend a lifetime watching another man’s life, admiring him and comparing his humanity to the original purpose of God’s work. It also didn’t sound appropriate to explain fifty years of waste, and then up and realizing just how important said man was, and how much it meant to find him and save him, bring him back to the world he always belonged to. Not some cage of monsters that tore each other apart for their own amusement and need.

How could he explain to a man, or a vampire, that they were the reason for his fall from heaven? That for him, he risked giving up his grace for all eternity?

Dean took a careful breath.

“It’s important to me that a man I know gets the life he deserved.”

Benny raised an eyebrow. “Not to surprise ya,’ but you’re the only man in here, chief.”

“I might not smell it, but I guarantee I’m nothing like I look.” Dean lowered his blade completely to his side and nodded to the vampire before him. “I’m here to get you home.”

Benny stared at him incredulously. Dean didn’t miss the fleeting shock, the confusion, before Benny chuckled and pointed his own blade towards Dean’s chest.

“What’s to say I won’t slit your throat and go on my merry way?”

Dean offered a weak smile. “I guess I’ll just have to trust you.”

“First rule of purgatory, don’t trust anybody.”

Dean laughed, but it lacked humor or energy. “I’m too old to trust. The only thing I’ve got left to trust is you.”

“Could be your last mistake?”

Dean shook his head. “If it is, then there’s no point in getting out at all.”

Benny stared at him long and hard. Dean stared back.

For a brief moment, Dean wondered if Benny truly was lost to the world of monsters, that he would turn and walk away. But a twig snapped behind them, and whatever Benny was thinking, he made up his mind quickly.

“Well then, lead the way chief.”

Dean nearly sagged in relief. He started walking, and this time, Benny followed close behind him.

It took time, longer than Dean had hoped for to get back to the portal. During that time, he was painfully aware of Benny’s eyes on the back of his head, scanning him, contemplating him, assessing him. He couldn’t help but remember all the years he’d followed Benny, not so different from this, watching his every move and admiring how beautiful his soul was.

He wondered if Benny had any idea how incredible he was. Could Benny even know how different he was from the rest of his kind? Humans and vampires alike?

Benny was one of a kind. And Dean had been damned to prove it.

“Ya’ said you know me,” Benny said one day as they rested. They only had a few moments before the monsters came again, but Benny’s gaze was calm, curious. Dean glanced back at him briefly. He couldn’t look too long, lest he get lost in his bright blue eyes again.

“I did.”

“You look familiar,” Benny continued, drawing in Dean’s attention once more. “Can’t place ya’ though. Why is that?”

Dean shrugged and began marching again. “We only ever spoke once.”

“Not an awful lot to go on for ‘knowin’ someone.’” Benny said. Dean glanced back at him as they walked. Benny’s eyes were raised in that curious way, like he was getting some kind of sneaking suspicion.

Dean looked away and kept moving.

“You also look pretty young for a human. Younger than me, for sure.”

At that, Dean laughed. “Trust me. I’m _definitely_ older than your baby ass.”

“You’re an interesting sort, aren’t ya?’” Benny said.

“You could say that.”

The questions didn’t stop. They marched for days, trekking back to the place Dean had entered this forsaken cage. Benny didn’t seem to have a care in the world. He talked consistently, not even when they were cutting off heads and slaying bodies left and right.

“So how old are ya’ anyway?”

“Not a talker? Or do ya’ just like bein’ a mystery for everybody else ta’ figure out?”

“Ya’ know me right? What’s my favorite color?”

“Well some slimy worm’s got a hold on _your_ tongue. Do ya’ got _anythin’_ to say?”

Dean bore it all in careful silence. He only spoke if he absolutely had to. He didn’t want to make an attachment to this man. He was already helplessly devoted to him.

He just wanted to make sure Benny was safe. If they talked, Dean was afraid that he’d never find the self-control to leave Benny alone again when they made it back to earth.

But still, Benny persisted. It was only when they were a few hours away from the portal that Benny sighed heavily.

“For somebody so determined ta’ rescue me, ya’ certainly don’t seem ta’ like me much.”

Dean stopped walking and looked back at him. Benny’s eyes were heavy, disappointed. He’d started to slow down in his words, only offering up questions or comments every few minutes or so. Dean was beginning to think the vampire was giving up. But now he could see that Benny was only disappointed, sad.

It made sense. All this effort to rescue him, and Dean had barely looked at him since offering to get him out.

Dean stepped closer to the vampire, keeping his gaze steady and fixed on the blues before him.

“There’s nobody in this damn universe that I like more than you.”

“You have a funny way of showin’ it brother,” Benny replied, raised his eyebrows in surprise.

Dean’s jaw tightened and he shook his head. “I’m trying not to get attached to you.”

“Aw,” Benny put a hand to his chest. “You wound me, darlin.’ Am I really that awful?”

“No,” Dean said, tried not to snap. “You’re too _good_. I want you to go back to the life you deserve. I want you to be happy.”

“Well, not ta’ bother you brother,” Benny replied. “But I’m pretty happy havin’ somebody to talk to again. There ain’t nobody topside that’ll be still alive to miss me.”

Dean hesitated. He hadn’t even considered that possibility. Benny’s eyes widened when he saw the realization dawn.

“Ah. Guess who’s remembering who’s older than they look now?”

“You still got a baby ass,” Dean snapped. Benny laughed.

“Says the human who looks like a doll.”

“I ain’t human.”

“So ya’ keep sayin,’” Benny looked amused. Dean rolled his eyes and started walking again.

But this time, he could practically _feel_ Benny smiling at the back of his head. He sounded happier when he asked again, “I kinda’ figured you were somethin’ else by that blade in your hand.”

Dean briefly glanced down at it. He took a deep breath, waited for the inevitable question to come again.

“What kind of guy, or thing, carries that around?”

“It’s an angel blade,” he replied. He hadn’t stopped walking, but he suddenly realized the companion steps behind him had ceased.

Dean stopped and looked back. Benny stared at him from a distance, his face wide open and vulnerable. Dean was sure if he tried, he’d probably be able to read every emotion on the other man’s face. But he kept still, waited for Benny to come to whatever conclusion he was searching for.

“You’re an angel,” Benny said quietly. Dean nodded. “So… Are you rescuin’ me for some higher purpose or somethin?’”

Dean flinched and was about to shake his head, but hesitated. “If you’re asking if I’m doing this on orders, the answer’s no.”

“Then why’re you here?” Benny’s gaze narrowed. He looked frustrated. Dean couldn’t really blame him.

“I already told you. You deserve to be happy. You’re a good person, and I couldn’t leave you in a place like this.”

“What, so you were around when I was sent in?”

Dean quickly backtracked, tried to think of some excuse to hold them out. They were literally only hours from the portal. Couldn’t this conversation have waited?

“The other angels took me away before I could save you and Andrea.”

Benny flinched visibly at the name. Dean regretted it, but Benny no longer looked upset. He looked sad and heavy. The human emotion in Dean’s veins wanted to hug the man. But he held back, waited for the backlash that was coming for him.

“I…” Dean said after the silence stretched too long. “I really tried. I was _right there_. I was going to save you. I was even around when you got turned. I did everything I could, I swear to God I did. I just… couldn’t.”

“An angel swearing to God?” Benny raised an eyebrow, but the humor was gone. “Sounds serious.”

“It was,” Dean replied simply. “It still is.”

Benny tapped the edge of his blade against his pants. He looked around purgatory, then back to Dean.

“Ya’ couldn’t save us then,” Benny said quietly, finally. “What makes you think you can save me now?”

Dean stared at him. Benny stared back.

The sounds of twigs and leaves snapping startled Dean, but Benny didn’t move. Dean sighed and ran a hand over his face.

“Back then I was under orders. I was supposed to slay monsters, protect humans,” he tried to explain. “As long as you were human, the other angels didn’t care how much I cared about you. But then you were turned…” He took a shaky breath, but Benny didn’t interrupt. He stayed attentive, thoughtful. “After you were turned, I wouldn’t let them kill you. You reminded me of God, of humanity in the beginning. I couldn’t… I refused to let that be destroyed. They took me away for a while, and by the time I got back to earth you were with Andrea. I was going to protect you then, but the angels tracked me down before I could stop your old nest from finding you.”

Benny took a sharp inhale. Dean continued, “I fell from heaven. They banished me. I wandered the earth for a few years. But I couldn’t live knowing that I’d failed you. I needed to make it right.”

“What am I worth to you?” Benny asked.

By now they could hear the roars of oncoming monsters. If they didn’t leave now, they were going to be leaving in a mess of gore. But still, Benny didn’t move.

“ _Everything_ ,” Dean snapped, more angrily than he meant to, but they needed to move _yesterday_. He couldn’t wait for Benny to make up his mind about that. “Now I don’t care if that offends you or freaks you out. But there’s no way in hell I’m leaving here without you. So are you coming or not?”

Benny opened his mouth to speak, but was interrupted by a werewolf jumping from the thicket. Benny swung his blade, caught it hard in the shoulder and ducked away.

“Coming,” Benny grunted. Dean grabbed his hand and ran.

They made it to the portal with more cuts and blood than Dean wanted. Benny was breathing heavily from a bad gash to his arm. He’d need blood to heal that one. Dean pulled Benny’s good arm over his shoulder and ran harder. When he spotted the portal overhead, swirling and blazing power and grace, Dean nearly sobbed in relief.

“You first,” Dean grunted. Benny sounded like he was about to retort, but Dean didn’t have the time to listen. He shoved the vampire through the portal. He turned to look back, gauged how far the rest of the monsters were.

He cried out when a shifter jumped a foot away from him. Its hand-crafted blade plunged into Dean’s side and he shouted, grabbed the monsters hands at the hilt and shoved back. The monster collapsed down the hill to join the rest of the oncoming monsters.

Dean stumbled back through the portal. A moment later, he was welcomed by earth sunlight and concrete ground to his face. He groaned, attempted to push himself over again, but fell flat on his face. His side burned painfully, the fire ripping through the rest of his body like a thousand needles. He cringed, shook when his hand swiped across messy blood that was pooling beneath him.

“Shit,” he heard a voice say above him. Two hands grabbed him roughly and shoved him onto his back. He looked up into dark brown eyes. Tessa. She looked pissed.

“What happened?” She snapped. “You know purgatory wounds don’t heal the same as earth injuries!”

Dean grumbled and closed his eyes against the harsh sunlight. He started to wonder if Benny had run away, but he heard footsteps come up short near his head.

“You an angel too?” Benny’s rough voice spoke through Dean’s darkness. A weak smile spread across his face. Benny had stuck around after all.

“Yes,” Tessa grumbled. “I take it was a hot exit?”

“Very,” Benny sounded guilty. Dean couldn’t imagine why.

Two fingers touched his forehead, and Dean felt gentle warmth spread through his side, reaching its way up to the rest of his body. He opened his eyes. His limbs still felt sore and ached, but when he looked down, the blood and gash were gone. He looked up at Benny’s face. He also appeared uninjured now, thanks to Tessa no doubt. But his eyes were drawn up in worry. Dean hated that look.

“My grace,” Dean gasped after a moment, hating that his body still felt so heavy.

Tessa’s lips hardened into a firm line. “There’s not much left,” she said softly. “I’d recommend taking it in once you have a chance to get back on your feet properly.”

“Then get me on my feet,” Dean snapped. Tessa looked exasperated, but nodded her permission as Benny knelt down to help Dean up.

Dean blushed at the close contact, the touch of Benny’s hands against his shoulder and side as he was placed gently on his feet. He looked away sharply when Benny stepped away. His hand drifted close to Dean’s own. He tried not to be as aware of it as he was.

“The angels are pissed at you, by the way,” Tessa said to Dean firmly. “I hope this guy is worth it.”

Dean nodded. “He is.”

Tessa rolled her eyes and looked at Benny. “Anywhere you need to be or want to go?”

Benny shook his head. He turned to Dean, and he saw a hint of anxiousness in his gaze. “Mind if I tag along with you, chief? Jus’ until you’re on your feet and I get a handle on things?”

Dean tried to be calm. He wanted to be cool, he really did. But he was embarrassed when he immediately cut out, “Yes!”

Benny’s lips twitched upward in a grin. Tessa looked done with both of them.

“I’ll put you somewhere the angels can’t track. Hope you like cabins, boys.”

She touched both their foreheads, and a moment later, they stood on a hill overlooking a lake. A large cabin stood behind them. Benny smiled so brightly Dean thought he looked like the sun.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hope you guys liked it! just as an fyi, i'm posting this chapter early today cause i'm heading out of town tonight. tomorrow will be sketchy for when i can upload chapter three, but i'll find a way :) 
> 
> in the meantime, i hope you enjoyed the chapter! have a great day guys!


	3. Chapter 3

Things were slow. Dean was careful about regaining his strength from purgatory, and every morning he stared at the shimmering remains of his grace, wondering if today was the day he could take it back without risking his own mortality.

Benny was quiet the first few days. Dean introduced him to the internet, helped him find ways to learn about the past fifty years he’d missed of humanity. Dean thought about offering his own story, but when he thought back, he couldn’t remember anything further than bars, drugs, and naked bodies. He decided none of it was worth sharing.

But it didn’t stop Benny from approaching him three days of google later, huffing and complaining about technology and its complexities. He then seemed to look at Dean for the first time, and asked, “You said you were an angel?”

Dean nodded, looked back down at the mug of coffee in his hands. He poured in three more sugar packets before Benny continued, “So you’d know what I missed. Can’t ya’ just tell me what happened?”

Dean counted backwards from ten before replying quietly, “There’s not much to tell.”

Benny threw up his hands. “Then why you got me lookin’ all this nonsense up online?”

Dean shrugged. “You said you wanted to know. I don’t have any answers for you.”

“How about the president righ’ now?”

Dean blinked, wracked his mind and tried to remember. Benny seemed to realize Dean didn’t know and sighed.

“What have ya’ been up to all this time?” He sounded tired again. Dean hated the sound, but he didn’t know how to fix it.

Dean shrugged and took a sip from his mug. “Let’s just say I haven’t been in the best place lately.”

Benny deadpanned. “Bein’ in purgatory for fifty years isn’t bein’ in ‘the best place lately.’ Where were ya’ at?”

Dean set his mug down and looked right back at him. “I was an angel. Heaven wasn’t home, but it was family. I was disowned and banished. I fell from heaven. Where do you think I was?”

Benny stared at him. Dean immediately felt guilty, but couldn’t bring himself to take the words back. He looked back down at his mug, a thought occurring to him.

“How long till you need blood?” He asked.

Benny looked surprised. It occurred to Dean that may have been the reason Benny looked so tired lately. Hell, it was probably the reason for all the tension going around between them. A vampire and a temporary human? Dean didn’t expect it to be smooth sailing.

“I can make it another day or so,” Benny replied after a moment, honestly. “Figured I could just hunt around the area for some animals or somethin.’ Don’ worry about it.”

It somehow didn’t stop Dean from thinking about it. He wondered if he could call Tessa, ask about blood banks and if they could tap into that recourse.

But Tessa had already risked enough for him. Dean caught himself looking at his grace more and more often.

“How long till ya’ get your power back?” Benny asked the next afternoon. They’d migrated back out onto the field, both overlooking the lake and its beauty. They sat in foldout chairs. There was something unbearably domestic about it, both of them leaning back with beers in their hands, companionable silence between them. Dean normally would have started feeling nauseous hours ago. But with Benny only a foot away, he felt oddly calm and relaxed.

Dean touched the vial in his pocket for the hundredth time that day.

“Soon, I think,” he replied. “Once I do I’ll head out and get you some blood bags.” 

Benny looked up sharply. “Ya’ don’t have to do that for me, brother.”

“No, I do,” Dean replied, glanced back at him. “I owe you.”

“Seems to me you got that backward,” Benny said, raised his eyebrows. “You don’t owe me nothin.’ I’m pretty sure I owe ya’ an awful lot more.”

Dean huffed and shook his head. “You don’t.”

“Let’s agree ta’ disagree,” Benny finally said. Dean didn’t argue.

The next day Benny was twitchy and wouldn’t stop staring. Dean knew it was time to get him blood. He went back to his room for his vial, held it in his hands gently, and questioned himself again if he was rushing this too quickly.

His side had stopped hurting a little while ago, and some of the heaviness in his body was leaving. But he could never be too sure. It wasn’t like he was putting his full grace back in his body. It was only a little. Just enough to restore the basic elements of his power. Like his long life, healing abilities. He’d be lucky for even that much. For all he knew, it could just fizzle out inside him, do absolutely nothing.

He could be condemned to humanity for the rest of his significantly shortened life.

He thought back to Benny and his need for blood. Dean needed to get back to a hundred percent. Now.

He went back to the living room. Benny was sitting on the edge of the sofa, eyes fixed determinedly on the door. Dean didn’t have to guess what he was thinking about.

“I’m gonna’ head out,” Dean said. “Get you what you need.”

Benny huffed, glanced up at Dean. His pupils were dilated. He looked ready to pounce on him, but his control was incredible. Dean was once again struck by how amazing he was. Even now, as a vampire cut off from blood, a perfectly good human standing right in front of him, Benny held true. Didn’t attack. Dean was astounded.

“Looked online. Nearest blood bank is ten miles out. It’d be easier to just get a deer.”

Dean shook his head. “You and I both know that’s not enough.”

Benny’s eyes drifted down, locking onto the glowing vial in Dean’s hand. His lips parted, and he slowly stood. “Finally juicin’ up?”

Dean shivered. “That’s the plan,” he replied.

Benny nodded. When Dean didn’t move, Benny asked, “Do ya’ want privacy, or…?”

Dean snapped himself to attention and shook his head. “No. It’s just… It might not work. There’s not much left of my grace. I might just be… stuck.”

“It wouldn’t be too bad, would it?” Benny asked, his lips quirking up at the edges. Dean offered a small smile in return.

“Probably not.” He walked toward the front door, hesitated when his fingers touched the knob. “Um, I guess I’ll let you know how it goes.”

Benny nodded. The tension remained between them. Dean hoped it would work.

Outside the cabin was dark. The sky was clear, and stars dotted the inky black above him. The moon was gone, but Dean could see the old beat up truck in the drive. He had no idea if it worked. Neither he nor Benny had bothered to check.

But if his grace proved to survive, Dean wouldn’t have any trouble fixing the truck if it didn’t.

He opened the vial. The blue-grey light swept out from the bottle and straight to Dean’s lips. He sighed as it entered him, an old familiar hot and cold pushed through his body and into his veins, lighting up everything inside him like a hundred suns. Power rushed through his limbs, and Dean smiled.

Wings still burned, Dean was back.

He didn’t see Benny watching him through the window, or the small smile that lit his face when the light died down.

Dean didn’t notice. But he didn’t hesitate to jump in the truck and start it to life with a touch of his finger.

The drive wasn’t as long as Benny made it out to be. He found the bank, and despite its locked doors, Dean had no trouble getting in and finding enough bags to tide Benny over for another week or two. He made sure to get the common kind. He knew Benny wouldn’t want to hurt anybody who needed the blood coming in short supply. So he got what was absolutely necessary and got out.

When he returned, he was grateful to see Benny still waiting for him. He didn’t detect any blood in the cabin except from the bags in his own hands, and he didn’t miss the spark in Benny’s eyes when he detected the same.

Dean gave Benny privacy that night. Somehow it didn’t feel right to watch him drink human blood, even if Benny didn’t hurt anybody who didn’t have it coming.

The next morning the tension was completely gone from the cabin. Dean was an angel again. Benny was full and happy. It was the first time Dean heard Benny laugh since purgatory.

The day after Benny approached him and spoke softly, “I think I know where I’d like ta’ go.”

“Yeah?” Dean smiled, even if imagining Benny going anywhere away from him hurt like hell. He set his book down on his lap and turned to face Benny. “Where to?”

Benny shuffled on his feet, pointed to a map he’d printed out. “I was thinkin’ of goin’ back home. Seein’ what’s left of it. Maybe start over?”

Dean swallowed down his pain. Benny was leaving. But he was starting over. He was getting the life he deserved. He was getting a chance to have his life again. That, Dean could be joyful over. Even if Dean wouldn’t get to have a place in it.

“That sounds great,” Dean replied. “You deserve that.”

Benny smiled. “That means a lot, chief.” He started to turn away, but then hesitated and glanced back. “What about you? Got anywhere to go, angel?”

Dean bit the inside of his cheek, tried to look casual as he turned back to the book he was reading. “I’ll do what I did before,” he said finally. He already knew he would. He’d check in on Benny every once in a while, even if Benny never saw him. But he wanted to give Benny some peace. Let him live his life. He didn’t need some hopeless angel looking over his shoulder for everything.

“Well, that’s no way to live, cher.” Benny sat down on a chair in front of Dean. He fixed him with a look that said he was on a mission. It caught Dean’s attention, held it.

“How ‘bout this. You come with me?”

Dean stared at him incredulously. “W-What?”

“Come. With me,” Benny spelled out, his smile growing. “The way I see it, we don’ have a lot goin’ for either of us. Why don’t we build a little something for both of us?”

“You’re serious.”

“Very,” Benny grinned. When Dean remained silent, he backtracked, “But, ya’ don’t have to if ya’ don’ want to. I’d understand. It’s your life, I get it.”

“I want to,” Dean interrupted. Benny’s eyebrows rose.

“You sure there?”

It was Dean’s turn to smile. “Absolutely. When do you wanna’ go?”

Benny smiled. “How ‘bout now?”

That evening they climbed into the truck with a fresh new set of blood bags in the cooler, a set of radio tunes, and got on the highway before dark. Benny drove the entire way. Dean didn’t mind at all. It was different, being in the passenger seat.

His first few years on earth, unable to fly, had been a harsh transition. Cars felt small, confining. But he’d grown used to it. But never in all his time did he have a chance to see the world from the passenger seat. It offered a different perspective, and Dean wasn’t ashamed to admit how pleased he was to have the chance to steal glances at Benny whenever he wanted.

If Benny noticed, he didn’t say a word about it. Dean wondered if it was his imagination, or if Benny was purposefully brushing their hands together whenever the opportunity presented itself. Dean knew he wasn’t trying. No matter how much he loved Benny, he wouldn’t pursue something he couldn’t have. But the small touches were nice, especially when they stopped at gas stations along the way to Louisiana, Benny’s hands ghosting over his own to grab the snacks Dean had been eyeing with want.

Benny smiled a lot, Dean noticed, when they were on the open road. Benny didn’t have any trouble figuring out the radio, and he managed to find an old rock and blues station that he quickly found the words to.

Dean found some of his own favorite stations of classic rock, all too happy when Benny tapped his knuckles along to Kansas and Metallica, his sharp white teeth gleaming through his smile in the dying afternoon light.

They were too far out to reach Louisiana in one day. But they located an old motel that didn’t mind looking sideways at Dean’s handful of bills to cover the night. Benny looked at him oddly as they climbed up the stairs to their room. Dean only shrugged.

“My old lifestyle, it’s helpful. Trust me,” Dean said as way of explanation. Benny didn’t argue. He didn’t seem to care either when they walked in the room to find only the one bed.

It wasn’t like either of them _needed_ to sleep. But they weren’t just undying beings either. They still needed rest, and neither of them had felt like driving non-stop to the state. But just looking at the one bed was enough to make both of them blush as they fumbled for excuses of taking turns resting back and closing their eyes.

Dean let Benny have the first turn. They only needed a few hours anyway. But those four hours of Benny lying back on the bed, his chest moving slowly and rhythmically had Dean squirming in his seat, desperate to look anywhere but Benny’s resting form.

Around three in the morning Dean set about looking at the map again when Benny’s low rumbling voice echoed from the bed, “Why don’t ya’ just get yer’ ass over and sleep already.”

Dean jumped in surprise, glared at Benny’s unmoving form on the bed. His hat was pulled over his face, and Dean wanted to rip it off in spite. Instead he remained where he sat and replied, “Angels don’t sleep, ass hat.”

Benny’s chest rumbled with laughter. A smile spread slow across his face and he said, “Neither do vamp’s. But even I can tell ya’ need a break from consciousness. Now get on over here an’ don’t make me ask ya’ again.”

Dean blushed, and despite himself, found his body betraying him and moving towards the edge of the bed. He sat down, not bothering to take off his shoes or jacket as he leaned back carefully and settled onto his side, back purposefully set towards Benny’s body.

All was quiet for a few minutes, but soon the bed dipped, and Dean felt Benny’s warm breath behind his head.

“Ya’ gotta’ relax. Defeats the point if ya’ just lay there like a knot.”

Dean huffed and rolled his eyes. “I’ll do whatever works, thanks.”

“Well, you ain’t helpin’ me relax,” Benny said after a moment.

“Wasn’t this your idea?” Dean snapped.

He was startled by Benny’s hand on his waist.

“Relax darlin,’” Benny sighed. “Nothin’ll happen if ya’ don’t want it to.”

Dean was reassured for half a moment before the rest of his words sank in. He turned over, tried not to jump when he was suddenly inches away from Benny’s bright blue eyes and soft lips.

“Is that a proposal?” Dean asked quietly. He was oddly pleased to see a blush sweep across Benny’s cheeks.

“I’d be lyin’ if I said I wasn’t taken for the angel that tried to save me whenever I wasn’t lookin.’”

Dean frowned. “I don’t want to if you just feel like you owe me, because you don’t.”

“Thought we agreed to disagree?” Benny said, but when Dean’s frown hardened he sighed. “It’s not about debt,” he finally said. “But you’re attractive, and you’re better than anybody I’ve known since purgatory. I like ya.' I know it’s been awhile, but I’d like ta’ get back in the game eventually, if ya’ catch my drift.”

Dean blushed.

“I was hopin’ my talk about starting over together might drop a hint but I guess I coulda’ been more obvious…”

“Maybe a little,” Dean nearly laughed, too stunned to do much else. “But you’re serious?”

Benny shrugged nervously, his lips drew up in an anxious smile. “Like I said. Only if ya’ want to.”

Dean stared at him, his smile falling as the seriousness of Benny’s words sunk in.

“Dean?” Benny asked softly. “Hey, I mean it if ya’ don’t want to. It’s no big deal—“

Dean didn’t wait for him to finish. He pushed himself forward and covered Benny’s lips with his own. He was right. They were soft, firm against his own but blessedly soft in all the right ways. Benny was quick to react, placing his hands on Dean’s hips as he swung his legs over Benny’s, effectively pinning him beneath him.

“I’d love that,” Dean breathed when they finally parted. Benny was blushing to the tips of his ears, and Dean couldn’t be happier knowing he’d put it there.

“Then how ‘bout you kiss me again, darlin?’”

Dean grinned. “With pleasure.” And he did just that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay, so i know i said i'd post this chapter Saturday, but technically, it's just really really late Saturday my time. so i hope you all didn't have to wait *too* long. 
> 
> i hope you all enjoyed the chapter! i've decided not to write an epilogue after all, since i feel this chapter ends perfectly just the way it is.
> 
> i hope you all enjoyed the story :) thank you so much for reading.
> 
> for further questions or comments, my blog: 
> 
> deanbennylife.tumblr.com


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